“You Don’t Plan for Failure.”

insane courageSaid a fellow classmate at CrossFit yesterday morning as I was anxiously awaiting my turn for the last back squat.  I stood staring at her for a moment, trying to process what that meant for the next few minutes and next few ..well, rest of my life. I always seem to get stuck thinking about the “what if I fail” (meaning: what if I don’t meet my own expectations?) that I never even thought about not planning for it.   I was eyeballing the extra 20 pounds another mate put on the bar and I said “I don’t know about that.”  Denise smiled a big sweaty grin at me and I knew I had to at least try.  Stepping up to the bar I said “What do I do if I get stuck? Just let it roll off my back onto the floor?” I was desperately nervous about this, and I didn’t even hear their answer.  I just heard Denise’s voice resonating in my head “You don’t plan for failure.”  Waiting for me, silently suspended in the rack, the bar and the weights looked ominous.  I blocked out all the noise in my head. Don’t think, just do. I put my shoulders underneath the bar and I lifted the 145 pounds onto my back for one final squat.  Down…okay, this is really heavy, but not impossible…just don’t stop here….uuuu…uuuuuu…uuuuup.  It was done. I did it. I achieved a new PR.

Fast forward to tonight’s hellacious run.  I can’t even begin to describe how bad it felt, how my morale was low to begin with after anticipating the event all day.  I knew how hot it was going to be and I was tired from the workday and dinner making, and dancing around all of the toy cars and airplanes sprinkled on the floor.alice and mad hatter I would imagine that it went so poorly because of a variety of reasons. I can say that I’ve eaten poorly the past few days, I haven’t been drinking enough water, not sleeping good enough or long enough, I sat too long during the day today, the heat, the humidity, the fact that I didn’t stretch out at all today or yesterday or any other day, the other fact that I didn’t warm up either because I was quickly losing daylight, and/or the simple fact that I expected failure so that’s what I got. I didn’t meet the expectations I had, but I hadn’t planned to meet them in the first place.  Denise’s words resonated in my head again.  All throughout my trip around town I thought about those 5 little words, “You don’t plan for failure.”  And so I pushed my 2-3 miles into 4 and I told myself that even though it didn’t feel good, it still went well.  I saw the sunset and got to drink up the last few bits of summer air.  When I ran, I ran faster than usual during my last mile. I told myself to enjoy the feeling of being really hot, like insides were cooking hot.  I told myself to remember this so when it’s cold and windy in a month or two I can think about how great it felt to be dripping with sweat in the humid air.  I also told myself that tomorrow is a new day and I will have a better attitude toward running and training.  I will be more accepting of what my body can do…more accepting of everything.   Thank you, Denise. what-would-you-attempt-to-doDo it! Whatever your answer to the question above is – DO IT.  Take Denise’s advice, like I’m trying to do, and don’t plan for the fail. Don’t think, just do.

One Step at a Time,

Mama K

 

About Soleful Mamas

Powered by sunshine and friendship, Soleful Mamas is half support group/half running club. Our tribe is committed to empowering women of all ages and abilities one mile at a time. We are committed to inspiring those around us to live stronger, healthier, and more confident lives through the power of running and adventure experiences. We’d love for you to join us!

We want all Mamas to know that as you blaze your trail of awesomeness, we’re with you every step of the way!

4 Comments

  1. I can relate to those runs after those long days and with low morale. On those runs I feel like it’s a victory no matter how it turns out! Well… I feel that way when I can muster a positive thought about it. 🙂 Keep chasing that positive view of things!

    • It really is those little victories that build the confidence to say “I can do this!” on race day. I just can’t believe how hard it’s felt this time around. I’m really curious to see how the strength training changes the race day performance (if at all) with a little bit of rest next week. Happy Running!

Leave a Reply